My dad will get it

Tonight I took Madeline to her piano and voice lesson.  I sat in the lobby, reading my book as I do each week.  With all of the lessons that take place i can hardly tell which is Madeline and which are someone else's child so I don't even try.  Then out of the blue I heard this powerful voice singing the song that Madeline has been practicing (to be announced at a later date when she gives me permission) and sat straight up when I realized it was my daughter!  I got up out of my chair to go hear the conversation that she was having with her teacher when i received the greatest compliment from my child.  She's been practicing her song with a CD that I burned from itunes.  It has the band that sings the song and she's just been singing along.  I had noticed yesterday that she's probably ready for an accompaniment version where she wouldn't be following the lead singer but would be the lead singer.  As I listened to her teacher tell her that she needed to get such a version to practice with Madeline said "My mom can do that."  Her teacher asked "Do you have one?"  Madeline replied "No but my mom will get it for me."  I smiled as I realized that her words about what I would do without even asking me were not about a pompous attitude or a spoiled child but were in complete trust that I would supply her with whatever she needs. 

I was both blessed greatly by her confidence in me and then humbled just as much by the realization that I don't always speak with the same confidence in my Heavenly Father.  Despite the fact that Jesus Christ himself told us not to worry (Matthew 6:25-34) I do at times and shame on me.  How offended would I have been if I'd overheard Madeline say "I don't know if I can get that because I don't know if my mom loves me enough to get it for me" but isn't that what we're essentially saying about God when we doubt that He will act on our part? 

The book that I was reading in the lobby is titled "How Children Raise Parents."  When I heard her singing and got up from my chair I had been thinking about all the things that i have learned as a parent thus far and how God has used the experience to sanctify me in so many ways... and then He did it again.  So often God uses the mirror of myself that I see through the lives of my children to show me who I am and the changes that have occurred within me and those that still need to take place.  It's not always a warm and fuzzy experience but I am grateful for each and every one.

"And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus."  Philippians 4:19

Just so you all know, whatever I need, my Heavenly Dad will do it.  My dad will get it for me.  :)

The gentleness of a mother...

This morning I am reading in 1 Thessalonians. First and Second Thessalonians are two of my favorite bible reads. I just love the nuggets of encouragement and guidance that Paul gives. The one that struck me this morning began in verse seven.

"but we were gentle among you, like a mother caring for her little children. We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well, because you had become so dear to us." 1 Thessalonians 2:7-8

Am I gentle when I care for my children? If I am honest, I know that the answer is, at best, sometimes. Sometimes I am not. Sometimes I let my mind become focused on other desires I have in life and I'm short with them. Sometimes I let fatigue win and my tone is harsh. Sometimes I place my expectations on them, instead of God's, and I'm astonished when they fail. Sometimes, though, I hear their laughter as they play together and I remember the distinct privilege I've been given.

In the next verse, verse nine, Paul says, "worked night and day in order to not be a burden to anyone while we preached the gospel of God to you." Just like a parent works day and night, so did Paul as he "raised" the small church in Thessalonica. He admits that it was hard work, just as parenting is but he was delighted to do it. He later goes on to say that the words "holy, righteous and blameless" could be used to describe how he was. I'm not sure those will be the words my kids use to describe my mothering but I'm convicted by that.

A while back I was asking Madeline a question about her piano teacher when she said "Which teacher? I have several teachers." Curiously, I asked who all these teachers were. "I have Miss Erika for piano and voice. I have Miss Strebeck for fourth grade and you are my teacher for life and how to love God."

I couldn't help but smile and yet feel a little overwhelmed by the important role she gave me, "life and how to love God."

I am confident of this, if there is a job that I will do more important than that of parent, I cannot imagine what it could be!

Dearest Madeline & Gavin, I am delighted to share the gospel of Jesus with you and it is a privilege to share my life with you every single day! I promise to work day and night to not burden you by my own selfish junk but to love you as you are. I will remember that my mothering should be gentle and I pray that God will make a miracle happen on the days I'm really struggling with that. It's never your fault. It's always mine and my trying to do too much. You are supposed to act like kids. I love you both with everything I am and I am convinced that being your mom is the greatest contribution to this world I can make! Love~Mommy


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Life

A while back I was watching Madeline and Gavin play the game Life on our Wii. Gavin had the most money and the biggest house but no kids. All he could say, over and over, was "I just wish I could have kids." Madeline had much less money but two kids and was perfectly content.

Tonight all four of us played. When Chris and my Mii characters "married" other people in the game the kids got sooo upset. Even in a game they couldn't stand the thought of their mommy & daddy not being together.

I guess some things transcend from the reality of life to the game of "Life."


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